Badass Thriving

Doodles and Dreams

jenn harkness

Thinking of what’s next. I want to design a life around slowing down and breathing more. I am contemplating how I can put peace ahead of productivity, and building a life I don’t need a vacation from. My body is screaming at me again: TOO MUCH. I’m listening.

It’s been thirteen months of crisis work for me in the day job and it shows. As we get through the immediacy of the pandemic into the “new normal,” that’s when the real work will begin. That’s when we will all exhale and say, “what the fuck just happened?” Then the depth work of trauma integration and post traumatic growth will begin. You can’t really fully process trauma while you are still in it, we are just coping through.

Today, we are still in the trauma, but we can see a light with vaccine distribution. We will be in and out of this shit for years to come in some ways, even with vaccines. So, I ask myself: what is the most sustainable way to ride this out and support others along the way? I ask you: what do you need to set yourself up for the road of recovery? As always: answers come when we slow down. Be gentle out there friends.

May we all sail in peace.

7 thoughts on “Doodles and Dreams”

  1. I’m married to a New Zealander and moved back to New Zealand six months before the shit hit the fan. As an American I still have a lot of ties to the USA, including my youngest son, grandchildren and siblings. I think about them every day as they live through this hell while my life has basically carried on as normal. Even I find that I have pandemic fatigue and now scroll past news stories about the vaccine and Covid deaths and all kinds of pandemic related things. While I feel somewhat guilty or at least awkward about this I think it’s a form of self preservation. I can’t even imagine what it must be like for folks back in the States dealing with this on a daily basis.

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    1. Thank you for the compassion and insightful comment. Yes, it has been such a contrast in healthy nations and not during all of this. In Seattle, our kids are just going back to some hybrid school now after a year of doing online public school. Gun violence is up by 48%, domestic violence and sexual assault are up, addictions and mental health stats are astronomical. Tragic is a word I use often. Eric says “unnecessary” a lot, and it all has been. Thank you for naming this contrast. I wish your family well here in the states, and I understand the guilt and awkwardness, I am grateful you haven’t had to deal with it in the same way. If the whole world had done what we did, all of this would have been so much worse. And even in countries like NZ…it’s been stressful in one way or another for everyone. So hard. Such a shit show. Fair winds out there!

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  2. I feel your words on a deep level. So many aspects of our lives will never return to where they were a year ago. We are hesitant and distant and fearful in new ways and uncertain whether it’s safe to trust those in charge or even our paths set ahead. Walking on eggshells and with caution is exhausting. I’m all for slowing down and taking the time to see beyond the calendar agenda. I hope you find your pace and the peace within that new path.

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